Many people dismiss Jessica Simpson as just another pop star cautionary tale. But despite the fact that she has been the subject of tabloid fodder the past few years, the fact is that Simpson has had a remarkably successful career. With over 20 million albums sold around the world, even if you aren’t a fan of the music, you have to recognize her commercial success.
Although her stint as a reality TV star and movie starlet have left much to be desired, Simpson still has her hands in plenty of entrepreneurial endeavors. With the help of stylist Ken Paves, Simpson has launched a successful line of hair and beauty products via HSN, including Jessica Simpson hair extensions. Since the release of this line, she has expanded to include handbags, shoes and other clothing items. After a two-year hiatus from the music biz, Simpson has stated she’s planning to release a new holiday album in the near future.
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Growing up, I didn’t fit in anywhere and suffered great shame, believing I’d brought the affliction upon myself. I felt powerless. No matter how hard I tried, it seemed my hands had a mind of their own. “What’s wrong with me,” I’d often wonder. There was just a point where I said it was time to deal with my eyelash and eyebrow hair loss.
Since the age of 12, I’ve suffered with a condition called Trichotillomania, which is layman’s terms for Compulsive Hair Pulling. Although the physical devastation was severe, and thank God for waterproof eyeliner, the emotional damage was worse. When I was young, no one, including my doctor, knew how to help. I was alone.
For years I’ve worn long wigs with hair reaching to the middle of my back, but with the heat wave we’ve been experiencing this summer, I was ready to free myself from my flowing locks. After searching for hours to find a suitable style, I came across Gabor wigs. They have the widest assortment of short styles I’ve ever seen, and I found several that perfectly complemented my bone structure.
And unlike many of the other wigs I’ve found, Gabor wigs have highlights and lowlights, which definitely add an extra dimension to the look. I finally settled on a bob, which I think I’ll wear until the weather cools down a bit.
I spoke to my new friend, one I’ll call Jane, who had seen one of my videos about makeup application, as well as my story about my life with Trichotillomania, and gave me a call. I spoke with Jane for quite some time on the phone, listening as she shared her story; one that held much pain. She used clip in hair extensions as well as a baseball cap to hide her head hair loss. And makeup to hide her lash and brow loss. It was so sad to see how “trich” had emotionally paralyzed her previous self-esteem and ability to enjoy life. Boy, could I understand. I shared with her for over an hour about how her value isn’t defined by her appearance. So easy to say, but invaluable to possess.
My heart truly hurt for her; how she had been robbed of so much due to these devastatingly paralyzing issues. I could relate on many levels of how it used to be for me. I want to share more on a personal level my process of how I’ve overcome the emotional crippling I experienced. I have hidden almost all my life, wearing waterproof eyeliner to hide the effects of my pulling. Now I have gone out many times without any makeup on. I am so thankful to not really care anymore what people think about me. How I look is so not who I am. I think people that don’t understand their worth are quick to judge others. Now I can see that it never is about me if someone is critical or hurtful. Hurting people hurt people. I am so glad to get that internally. How freeing that has been.
Today I spoke with a precious woman who has a condition called Trichotillomania (compulsive hair pulling), which is also what I have, as well as other issues I believe are rooted from low self-esteem. I saw a picture of her and she was strikingly beautiful but couldn’t believe that of herself because she also struggles with BDD, or Body Dysmorphic Disorder. Instead she saw herself as ugly and refused to let anyone see her without her amore wig, or her makeup on, nor would she go out of her house unless it was absolutely necessary, and even then she would have many items on herself to hide under.
I now believe, looking back, that pulling/overeating, etc. was my way of “coping” with my feelings of overwhelm and self-loathing. I can’t tell you how incredibly confusing it is to be the one, at my own hands, pulling out lashes and brows uncontrollably, over not being able to stop eating even though I know afterwards I will hate myself even more. Just as synthetic wigs have fake hair, I felt fake through and through. It took me until I was 30 to even be able to take on the issues that plagued me. I felt like was emotionally delayed in so many ways. Thank goodness for good people.
Hiding was always on the forefront of my mind. I so wish I hadn’t tried so hard to hide myself, my imperfections, like a bad mens hair pieces. So obvious, but too embarrassed to reveal their true “imperfection” of having hair loss. Why is it that so many struggle with shame and inferiority? I believe our society has a bit to do with that. It’s not an easy road to take, but well worth it. I’ve heard it called the “road less traveled”. Grab a sack lunch and let’s walk down that road a bit right now.